Mindscanner Issue #74
Summer 2008

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You Klingon Son! You killed my Bastard!
by Qob!

Qob in SpaceI don't know about you, but I am 12 years older than I was in 1996. It's been a big 12 years. Most of KAG was full of piss and vinegar in 1996, the world was our oyster. We were happily feared and worked hard at being outrageous. Since then folks have married, gotten jobs had kids, lost jobs, got divorced, remarried, lost loved ones, moved and just generally been mugged by real life. Also we have been mugged by Paramount and the "creators" of Star Trek. We've seen our beloved Klingons go from "OMG! The Klingons are here, we're DOOMED!" to such an afterthought that it looks like there will be no mention of Klingons in the next movie. They're sticking with the Romulans as villains, brilliant! (not)

But, anyway! The thing I want to talk about is this: Klingons (us rubberheaded fans) are being taken for granted. As we've gotten older, those of us who are not gibbering maniacs, have mellowed. Now in real life, that's a good thing. You're finding your place in society, you're paying taxes, you aren't being arrested every Saturday night anymore. Good for you! But that's not what fandom should be about. Now the feddies, what's left of them, are all about being grownups, we aren't. Or we shouldn't be. Be a Bastard.

Whatever you do, make sure that people don't take Klingons for granted anymore! Be a Klingon Bastard. If you do an event in Klingon and go to the local Burger Thing to eat afterwards, be noticed! Insult your waitron! If you eat with the Feddies, claim their French Fries in the name of the Klingon Empire! If you go to a bar, loudly suggest that the local sports team has dubious claims to manhood! Be Clever! Be unsettling! Do the Unexpected! Be fun and funny! Stay in Character as much as possible, if you encounter other fans in costume, Be the Klingon Bastard to them. Years ago, I heard someone say, "OK the Klingons are here, now the party gets started" Be a party starter! If you must work with the Feddies, let them know THEY are working FOR YOU, not the other way around. Be a Bastard.

qomassThere is a perception that KAG is a wing of StarFleet international, that we are tame. While as real people we should not be pricks and buttheads, we have a duty. No one should ever take Klingons for granted. This is especially important with our big Convention season in full swing. Kirk cried out "You Klingon bastard, you killed my son!" While no murder should be performed at conventions, we do encourage you to steal the spotlight to be antagonistic to uniformed feddies when you are in Klingon. To reject the Khitomer accords and show people that Klingons still have teeth! Be a Bastard.

Bastards! "Do not go gentle into that good night...
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

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